Before I became a Christian, I was very unhappy because many areas of my life were going poorly. For example, the relationship aspect was not going well. I was very sad and started to think maybe God had forgotten me. I knew I was not good. I, however, also felt I had absolutely nothing good. I started thinking, “am I not worthy to be loved?”
That day at Aroma church, the sermon topic was the gift of singleness. From this message, I learned that whether I am happy or sad, single or not single, every season in my life is a gift from God! I still felt, however, that God was not accepting my prayers because I wasn’t a Christian. I was a little bit angry about this, so I gave God a challenge. I asked him, “so God, is it because I am not a Christian that you are not listening to me? If you really love me so much, and you hear my prayers, please prove it to me.”
The next day, I participated in an Aroma outreach event called Action for Jesus. It was called “Create and Share.” For this activity, we prayed over, then created cards with encouraging words and pictures to present to people in the street. Even though I participated in this event, I received one of these cards from my friend Gale. On it, she wrote the Bible verse that says “There is no fear in love” (1 John 4:18a). She also encouraged me to not be afraid of others giving up on me. Finally, she wrote that I am beloved, special, valuable, unique, a creation of God, and that God loves me. Also, the words she used to say this were the exact words I use when I pray! This was amazing because I had just met Gale that day! At that moment, I was thinking, “Wow. God is answering me!”
At first, after accepting Jesus and praying to receive Holy Spirit, I did not feel any different. The people around me, however, started asking what had happened to me. They wanted to know why I was so happy. I thought about it for a while. There weren’t any “good” things happening. The only change was, I had become a Christian. I also realized, more than just my mood had changed. After I accepted Jesus, I started to experience a lot of peace in my heart and mind. I stopped focusing only on results, and started living one day at a time. Now, I am no longer scared of having done something imperfect and that the Buddha or spirits may punish me. I know God is and will always be with me!